I used to be a regular blogger. Really. I posted regularly for years on Suicidegirls.com... I went for the tits and stayed for the community. I lost touch with the site a long time ago, and although I rejoined, I just can't get back into writing everyday. I reread a bunch of my old posts, and I didn't write about anything particularly interesting. Just my boring life; living at home, working part time at a department store, random hookups, and then I would talk a lot about movies I watched, like full on reviews, and then wax philosophical about music. Some how, people actually read it.
I think joining Tumblr is what screwed me over in this department. I love it for the most part, and am fully addicted with multiple accounts and several secondary blogs. It's gross actually. But as a result of the constantly updating, streaming images and information, my attention span has shrunk to nanoseconds. It is painfully difficult to concentrate on anything anymore. I cannot collect my thoughts whatsoever. And I hate it.
I decided to create this blog in an attempt to force myself to learn to focus again. Even if it's just on documenting my still boring, but slightly less so, life.
So onto the proper entry.
Even though no one is reading this as of yet, I suppose introductions are in order.
My name is Danielle.
I recently turned 30, which is still hard to believe sometimes. I don't feel much different than how I did when I turned 18. That is actually going to be a big focus of this blog; coming to terms with getting older and how no one really "grows up", we just get older. Being a certain age doesn't mean you know what the fuck you're doing, or ever will. We're all just bumbling around, trying to figure shit out as we go.
I've been married for about two and a half years. We've been together for 5 years, and it's the longest relationship I have ever been in. Relationships are fucking hard. But my mister is pretty awesome, and I never thought I would meet someone who accepts me, even if he doesn't always understand me, exactly the way I am. That itself is pretty remarkable.
We don't have any children, and I don't think I have any of intention of changing that. Pretty much all my friends have kids, and I love them all like crazy. I just like being able to give them back when it's all said and done. I am very selfish with my private time, and I don't see that changing. I'm not 100% opposed to having children, but I think it's more than 50%. Like, I'm on the fence, but one leg is firmly on the 'no' side of that fence, while the other is really and truly still in middle 'I don't know' zone.
While I don't have any kids, I do have a pet rabbit. His name is Dennis Hopper and he's just as surly as his namesake. He is into destroying Amazon packing paper, eating Romaine, and pooping everywhere.
A job? Oh yeah, I have one of those. I work for a large government contractor who does civilian information technology. That is a fancy way of saying they operate websites and call centers for government projects, like Medicare and the Affordable Care Act health insurance Marketplace. I am an internal support CSR for the Marketplace call center, after being a general CSR with the Medicare department for just over a year. What that means, is when the regular CSRs you get when you call get stuck or need help with what they're doing, or you decide to be a demanding tool and request to speak with a supervisor, they call me. And trust me, I am a GIANT bitch when the latter happens, which is far too frequent these days. Oh, and this does not mean you can come here and ask me shit about the Marketplace. I get enough grief and stress at work, and at least they pay me for that.
I live in Phoenix, Arizona. I am originally from Illinois, as is the rest of my family apart from my younger brother.
I grew up in the sprawling suburb of Mesa. There really isn't much of interest there. These days, it mostly consists of dying strip malls and tweeker motel squats.
About two years ago, we moved downtown and I have never been more happy with where I live in my life. I always thought Arizona was completely hopeless and couldn't wait for the chance to get out. But we've found ourselves a nice little niche, in the middle of the art district.
We live in an apartment that started out as a Route '66 era motorist motel, but as the city fell into harder times, became a crack motel / prostitute flop house. A few years ago, during a revitalization jag, the city bought (or possibly seized due to the criminal activity) the property and shut it down. In the time it was vacant, the crime in the area was said to decrease several hundred percent in a year or two. The whole thing was gutted, leaving only the masonry; cement floors, brick/cinder block walls. They renovated the entire structure, keeping the cement floors and exposed brick, and furnishing the rest with Ikea counters and cabinets. Our space was once two motel rooms, but the hallway has been ripped out, so it's like two rooms the same size, with a small hallway connecting the two, a tiny ass bathroom and a slightly larger kitchen space. It is actually way cooler than it sounds.
It is full of artist types, and the management company really tries to foster a sense of a proper community instead of a bunch of strangers who you have to share walls with. That way when you're woken at 4am by your upstairs neighbor blasting some 90's era Madonna, and you trudge upstairs to politely ask her to shut the fuck up, you actually get a note on your door in the morning apologizing for the disruption. True fucking story.
Oh, and there are no kids here. Another major plus after living in a GIANT apartment complex with several huge families with extremely noisy and downright rude little shits overrunning the place.
I used to do spend a lot of time knitting and cross stitching and making collages, but that was before I had regular access to beautiful high speed internet. I tend to leave a lot of projects unfinished once started.
As for general interests, I am into music and film, never finishing craft projects as I mentioned, playing racquet ball with my oldest, bestest friend, and consuming lots of art (either online or in museums. I am a great appreciator of art and I mean that in the most genuine, least conceited way possible). I am a Liberal, a Feminist, and a borderline Socialist.
I am nerdy and obsessive and a little compulsive.
I hate the heat.
I am a dog person.
I am a control freak.
I have a crush on Tom Waits, Richard Dawkins, and Henry Rollins.
I like singing in my car when I'm alone, but I hate driving.
I read Sherlock slash fiction.
My favorite member of the Fellowship is Gimli.
I've only seen a few episodes of Dr. Who (9th Doctor).
I've never seen Titanic or The Notebook.
I don't know how to find a good place to stop.
